Or Just Plain Ashamed? It's A Big Conversation
Published by The Duchesne
A survey done by Cosmo magazine earlier this year produced some not so unusual findings. Of 1500 men questioned, 1 in 3 would much prefer to have the wife at home rather than out and working. This means over 66% of men unless they're mega earners, like the idea of a double income in the household.
There is a condition attached to that though; men prefer to be the higher earner.
It seems men can never put their egos aside for a minute, and if they do, then rest assured it'll only be for a minute. A lot of talk is happening in the Black community regarding successful, beautiful black women not being able to find a suitable mate. The reason stated is:
" Men are intimated by a successful Black woman."
But how true is this? And is this a problem for only the Black community?
Sistas are doing it for themselves
Yes, women have taken the female revolution and ran with it like there is no tomorrow. Ever since women were allowed to earn for themselves, the goal was set. And that goal was to become what women call 'independent'. It has been achieved, men can't handle it, it's that simple.
It's not just the Black community. A lot of Caucasian relationships struggle or end due to jealousy of career on the husband's part. If we take a look at Hollywood, there are many Caucasian break ups that have been linked to the man not being able to handle how successful the woman's career is going.
Forget the race thing. This is a man thing.
Women are never jealous of their man's career. In fact, women will sacrifice theirs for their man. Why does the man have to be jealous of hers?
Men instinctively have a need to be the breadwinner or the main provider. They relish and want to be needed by their mate. The thought of knowing that their partner can 'dispose' of them at any time makes it very difficult for men to be comfortable with the idea of his woman earning higher.
High earning women are more likely to end up divorced says research
- Financially independent women can leave a relationship easier
- Dented egos on both parts (man feels less of a man, woman sees man as less of a man
- Men who are more financially dependent on their partner are more likely to cheat (seeking to affirm their masculinity elsewhere where they feel they are looked upon as a man)
- Successful women may develop resentment towards their less earning partner therefore losing respect for him.
For a happy 'balance', Professor Jay Teachman of Western Washington University, who took part in the research, suggests there should be a 60:40 split in earnings.
But wait for it....... the man must be the higher earner! Go figure.
And then men wonder why women believe they are threatened by their success. The truth is, men are both threatened and ashamed; because at the end of the day, no man wants to be the man 'behind his woman'.
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Photography, The Web